Brains, Yummy Brains! :-)

My mother caught our female dog licking our male dog somewhere that was making the male dog extremely happy. Needless to say, my mother wasn't very happy at all!!!!! I was going to post the next 'Tokyo Gay Hamster Wars', but I won't. I didn't do much today, and thought it might be a good thing to post ... but, then again, I ran into this: Stolen from Paul's blog:

Your Brain's Pattern

Your mind is a creative hotbed of artistic talent. You're always making pictures in your mind, especially when you're bored. You are easily inspired to think colorful, interesting thoughts. And although it may be hard to express these thoughts, it won't always be.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

p.s. I wouldn't eat brains of any sort ... just thought the post title had that zombie sort of feel to it! :-) I also thought of some incredible witty things to put as todays thoughts ... but now that I've sat down to write them, I've forgotten them! D'oh! Bodoh Dabido!

Out with the Old ... and a long wait for the NEW!

Last night my mother asked me if we were leaving at 9AM this morning. I said, 'I don't know!' Then she said, 'Well, make a decision, 9AM or not?' 'I don't know!' 'Okay, then WE ARE GOING AT 9AM tomorrow! Don't blame me if you're still tired!' So, I had been told! We were going somewhere this morning at 9AM ... I awoke at 7:30AM ... and then proceeded to lay about till 8:30AM ... when I suddenly heard my mother in the kitchen, and decided I better get up ... so I did! 9AM we were about to leave, and my mother decided we had to take my car. My brother Jeff wanted to take the other car ... because he couldn't be bothered swapping them around in the garage! I convinced him to let me drive. Where were we going? Shopping for a lounge suite. Good thing too, as we threw the other two we owned out. After going through a LOT of shops and stuff, we finally found a lounge we all could agree on. In fact, I found it first, and my mother rejected it as the colour didn't go with her curtains. Jeff tried it and liked it too. The sales lady explained (as was the case in every store we'd visited) that it can come in more colours than just the colour swabs which we left on them. So, my mother tried to lounge, liked it and went about selecting the colour from various books of swabs. We found a perfect match for the curtain colours, and I said we should take it ... only my mother wanted to see more swabs! It wasn't easy to find a lounge we all liked, as most aren't made for shorties like ourselves, and my mother's legs are a lot shorteer than the rest of ours. Anywat, I kept insisting that we take the swab colour which was a perfect match ... I'm not sure what my mother was expecting, but after inspecting a heap more swabs which weren't even close, she finally agreed with me. Then, she told me to go try sitting in the lounge. I told her I already did. Jeff and I had both already sat in it and agreed it was the best so far. She said she hadn't realised we'd sat in it. Huh? Not sure which planet she's on ... but geeees, that's annoying! So, my brother Jeff bought the lounge. While purchasing it, my mother made some joke about me and Jeff beating her up if she didn't do as we told her ... and Jeff took it personally, as he didn't find it funny. So, for the rest of the day he's been worried that peopel think he's a mother basher! My mother keeps trying to tell him to ignore it, as it was just a passing joke. Since throwing the other two lounges out, we haven't had a lounge to sit on ... and this one is going to take four to six weeks to get delivered! Funny, as I didn't want to throw out the lounge we were currently using, as I thought we should get a lounge first and THEN throw it out ... but, my mother and brother we so excited about a NEW lounge, that they threw it out on Tuesday night [read that as, my mother made Jeff and I throw it out]. We had Subway for lunch. I drove us home ... all the way, my mother was critisizing my driving and telling me to watch cars in other lanes. 'Watch out for that car, he might come across' - that sort of thing. It was very distracting, and I can't stand having people in my car doing that, as it's the sort of things which causes accidents! My brother's Television blew itself up a while ago, so he's given it to me. So when we got home,we opened it up to see if we could get it functioning. We couldn't find anything obviously wrong with it, so I'm going to take the two IC [Integrated Circuits] and other electronic parts outof it and see if I can make a robot from them ... well, one of the IC's is for PAL decoding and Video Processing ... so, it won't be too good for a robot. Unless that robot is a TV robot! :-) The other IC is a little mroe versatile, but still a TV type chip, so probably not much good for a robot, but I'll try to see if I can sus it out and see if it is of any good. Most likely not ... but you never know. Might be programmable, in which case it might be useful for what I want to use it for. I spent the day gluing my Warhammer models together. Actually, gluing my fingers together might be more accurate! ;-) We then had a game of 'Who Wants to be a Millionire' DVD edition. My mother was openly cheering my brother Jeff on against me. My mother got $1 000, my brother Jeff got $32 000, and I got to a kewl $250 000. I realised I couldn't answer the $500 000 question, so opted to take the money and run! Pity it wasn't the real thing! :-) I could do with the money. Then did the normal blog crawl of ... what is there now, forty or so blogs! Most from Malaysia ... gees, wonder if anyone in other countries have blogs? lol Just kidding.

Some passing thoughts

When a girl asks you to go to a nudist beach, does that mean she likes you, or she just wants to have a good laugh? American Dad is a lot better than American Idol, and a lot less annoying. 86 US soldiers have committed suicide in Iraq rather than get shot by Iraqis. I'm not sure about you, but if you get to the point that you would rather kill yourself rather than be killed, is there much difference? Why not put your suicidal tendency to good use and become overly heroic? At least when you do get killed, people will say you were the bravest person they'd met.

*****

I'm always amazed at some peoples refusal to accept reality or responsibilty. My mother's being really upsetting me lately. Mainly with her usual:

• Tell me a story that happened WHEN I was there.
• Tell me the news WHILE I'm trying to watch it on TV (as though her version is better than the one the newsreader is trying to tell me ... which I can't hear because my mother's talking over the top of it)
• Ask me to do something, and even after I've said yes, continue asking me the same thing, and going into indepth explainations as to what she wants done.

It was during one of the last ones, where she asked if I would lift one of our dogs TOBY onto the tressle this morning. She asked last night, and I said yes. Then, she went on, about how she couldn't do it as Toby is too heavy. I kept telling her, 'I know, I'll do it for you.' BUT, she continued over and over and I kept saying 'YES!' In the end she went, 'Something is bothering you, isnt it? I can tell, as you're getting upset. You always get upset when you're worried about something.' LIKE, NO!!! I'm NOT Worried about anything ... I'm pee'ed off that you can't take YES for a friggin' answer. Of course, last time I explained that to my mother, she just insisted I was lying, and it was obviously something else that was bothering her! Arrrrrrrrrrrgh! Why are all my family TOTALLY MAD? And will I go crazy if I stay here with them????

*****

I have NO idea what to do with my life! This is very depressing, as it's stupid that after 41 years of life (well almost 41 years), all the things I've wanted to do are constantly being blocked by people ... I think I want to go travellin again. Fold the business up, grab my passport, and just GO GO GO! Only, there is the lack of money, and the lack of knowing what to do when I get back! Life sucks!

1 Billion Friggin' Words ... and I only know about ten thousand of them!

Feeling a little left behind? Well, don't worry, we all are now that the English language has hit 1 BILLION WORDS! Actually, it's 1 Billion different uses of words and in some cases phrases! Anywat, it makes you feel VERY left behind. You think you know a lot of words ... well, you're probably not ready for scrabble against a computer that knows all those words! :-) Most of us don't need such extensive vocabularies anyway. It's not like we're going to need to know a 'cerebral hematosis' from a 'dysathria from inebriation'. [What the frig did I just say again???] So, we can happily plod along knowing a few hundred words and be happy knowing that the majority of the English speaking world will understand us. :-) It's a bit funny that this came up, because I had a slight arguement with someone a short while ago regarding this, as they claimed Japanese has more words etc than English ... their arguement being that you just had to join another Kanji to the end of any word and you have a NEW Japanese word. I could have argued that you could join English words together like that to form new words ... butIdecidednotto. [Yes, I just invented that new word too.] :-) I ended up not replying to the guy, as he obviously didn't know enough about linguistics to understand what constituted a word, and what was a phrase [etc]. It would have discombobulated him and left him flummoxed. Let's face it, on the internet you need to chose your battles wisely, and someone you are probably never ever goin to see or argue with again, really isn't worth arguing with.

****

Not that I want people to just beleive anything I say ... because whenever that happens, I always seem to screw up. I don't mind people doubting me and stuff. Sure 99.99% of the time I'm 100% correct ... but there is always the odd occassion ... like today. :-) My mother asked me for the answer to a question while she was playing 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' and I answered for her ... and got it wrong! Bwahahaaaaa! The funny thing was, she had the right answer, but just wanted to confirm it ... but went with my answer instead! Bwahahahaaaa! Lesson today, just because I say it, doesn't mean it's 100% accurate. Even I make mistakes, or have bad sources at times! :-) Now, who wants me to discombobulate them some more? :-)

The Tribulation ... Getting Closer by the Minute!

Some Old Pictures put up on my Tabulas Gallery. Yeah, you've seen most of them before. [Or all of them before].

*****

The Australian Govenment is introducing a 'SMART CARD' into Australia. Everyone opposed this thing once before considering it Nazi tactics. Well, now they GOvernment is saying that it isn't compulsory, BUT, if you don't accept it, you can't get medical treatment or welfare benefits. In otherwords, reject it and DIE DIE DIE!!!! The Prime Minister claims it isn't a TROJAN HORSE to introduce a new Australia Card type thing ... of course it isn't a Trojan horse JOHN, this is a frontal friggin' assault!!!!! Once introduced, the Government will claim it's no different to having an Australia Card, and it'll all become the defacto anyway ... so it IS THE AUSTRALIA CARD. For anyone who is a Human Rights advocate, it smacks of a 1984 controlled state. For religious leaders, it smacks of the tribulation. The term Tribulation means a 'Narrowing of the way' ... and when you find that your choices are being reduced to nothing by these sort fo Government tactics, then it truely is a narrowing of the way. The Government claims it is to combat fraud in the welfare system ... but, when they suggested it once before it was to combat terrorism ... and the one form the 1980's ... well, we never were told why we actually needed that one. It is all Government properganda. The welfare system in Australia is very tightly controlled, and if the Government was doing it's checking on people's backgrounds correctly, then we wouldn't have any welfare cheats. In fact, most of the criticism of the smartcard comes from the fact that it is insecure and won't actually stop the welfare cheats at all. Some people have suggested that it is so insecure that it will actually make it easier for welfare cheats, terrorists and others to cheat the system. Once again, it is about Big Brother type tactics in order for the Government to regulate people's lives and remove freedoms and choice to the people. The pot is slowly being brought to the boil, and the lobsters are too stupid to realise it, as they're not at the bottom where the water is already boiling!

You Know You're The Least Favourite When ...

My mother is still in a fowl mood. The only thing she's said to me all morning is, 'David, can you move your car?' Other than that, she's just ignored me. I waved to her when she drove off, but she didn't return the wave. Big question: What did I do to her to cause her to treat me this way? Well, as you can read yesterday, it might be that she just didn't get her way, then she decided to pretend that we were picking on her ... it's all just mroe bullstuff! I really get sick of it all. Anyway, here are some ways to tell if you're the least favourite of your parents.

1. They throw you out of home to stop you from going to University.
2. You get asked to FAIL subjects at school to help boost your elder brothers ego.
3. Your siblings get encouraged to call you 'POOFTER' and other insults, but you so much as call them a 'fool' and everyone comes down on you like a ton of bricks.
4. You get 'A's' for your subjects at school, but it means nothing. When your siblings do it, they get money for their good effort.
5. You get published as a writer ... it means nothing to them.
6. You are always being told you are never going to be anything.
7. When you try to study, they constantly interupt claiming that you study too much.
8. When you try to work, they constantly interupt with inane bullstuff [like what's happenin on TV].
9. Your elder brother gets parties most of his life, you get one when you're eighteen. [And only because you nagged them into it ... eventually ...]
10. Your father tells everyone you're gay .. even though you're not.
11. Your elder brother gets all the encouragement he can want about his efforts to play in rock bands ... he never gets anywhere.
12. You make it as a studio musician, as well as being in a few rock bands, but you're put down for your effort and it all gets ignored.
13. Inspite of the fact that you own your own business and work at it, your family considers 'Unemployed' as you don't actually work for someone elses company.
14. No one ever lifts a finger to help you, yet you are expected to drop everything when they need help.
15. Inspite of all the work you do around the house, you are considered lazy and even made fun of.
16. Your parents blame you that you were not born a girl, because that's what they wanted.
17. When you were married, your father hits on your wife!
18. Your mother likes to tell stories about you, embellishing them to make perfectly normal things sound like you're some sort of idiot.
19. Your mother will tell her everythin which has happened during the day ... even though you were THERE at the time, she will tell the story as though you are hearing it for the very first time!

I could go on ... but even I'm sick of hearing me complain about it ... grrrrr!!!!! It's just so frustrating! It's like I've been placed in a box which doesn't fit, and when the sides rip, they just move me to an identicle box!!! Grrrrrrrrrr! ONEONEONEONE!!!!!!!!11111111111111!!!!!!! Anyway, my mother has gone for a few hours (I hope), so time to study and work ... the only time I seem to be able to!

Mother in a moooood!

My mother was in a bad mood today! I got up, and she insisted we be patriotic and watch the ANZAC Dawn Service. Only, she'd missed it ... so she got a little miffed. Then, she decided to be annoying and stuff ... and so did my brother Jeff ... so I was getting pretty annoyed at both of them. Then they started arguing, and the dogs came to me for protection. I said, 'Don't worry, they're all mad.' Which I sort of meant as a joke, but that made my mother mad at me. She insisted Jeff was the crazy one, and wanted me to retract the statement. Then, she asked what we wanted to watch on TV ... and both Jeff and I said, 'Nothing. Why do we have to watch TV?' So, she turned it off and started to read ... out loud ... to annoy us! ARGH! Then, when she stopped, Jeff started to talk to me, and she started reading over the top of him again! I told her that she tells Jeff off for talking over the top of her, and that she shouldn't do that. She then got upset and said she was doing it as we wouldn't let her watch TV. I told her, 'No one is stopping you from watching TV. Watch it if you want.' 'No,' she replied. 'I'm reading a book. You're just trying to stop me from reading!' Then she made some comment that she's allowed to talk over the top of Jeff if she wants to! ARGH!!!!! So, she went back to reading her stupid book out loud! Then, she stormed off in a huff and went and had a sleep in her room. [We could hear her snoring away]. Then, Jeff started up. For some unknown reason, he was suddenly interested in what I can only call my 'missing years'. These were the ten years between when I was thrown out of home, till when I eventually started talking to my family again. [And some days ... like today, it seems like a big mistake!] Anyway, I was busy, so I really didn't want to talk about it ... but for some unknown reason, he's suddenly become very interested in knowing about it. Arrrrrrrrrgh! Eventually, my mother returned, but she was still in her mood. She wasn't talking to us ... and it really showed! I can tell you, I'm going to hear about this all week, how we somehow ruined her ANZAC day. I'm so friggin' over this sort of crap! Why can't I have been born into a normal family somewhere???? No wonder I always used to hope as a child that I was really an alien and that my real parents would one day come to get me! Those bastard aliens never did turn up to claim me! Argh!!!! Anyway, her bad moods usually puts me in a bad mood ... and somehow, she'll end up blaming me! The gist of her problem is she is bored and lonely, but she won't admit it. Anyway, I am tired and need sleep ... funny how someone elses bad mood effects the entire house!

Friggin' Cheating DVD Player!!!

My mother bought that 'Who Wants To Be a Millionaire' DVD game. We were playing it, and my mother and brother answered incorrectly and both went out of the game with $1000. I was left playing alone, and got to $125,000. I was going to answer the $250,000 question, which the answer was, 'The Hague'. I knew th answer, I pressed the button ... and the FRIGGIN' CHEATING DVD PLAYER OPENED AND TEH GAME STOPPED!!!! FRIG~ ONEONEONEONE!!!!!1111111!!!!!! I HATE THAT DVD PLAYER!!! My mother thought it was funny, as I walked off in a huff, and she asked if I was still playing. I said i wasn't because the DVD player cheats, which made her laugh even more! HATE HATE HATE HATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111111!

Taxing

Actually got my TAX done ... in Aussie, the financial year ends in July, and you have till October to do your personal tax ... but if you get an Accountant to do it every year, then you have till May ... which means I just got mine in before the deadline! lol It cost me $150, which was okay, as it was the same as last years. I will get $511 back, so that's a profit of $361 ... I would have all $511 if I wasn't so darn lazy and just did the thing myself ... which I might do. Being self employed most of my tax stuff would have already been done by the time I get around to doing it anyway.

*****

Had an annoying start to the day though ... my sister and her hubby dropped their kids off yesterday ... so we've had three tiny terrorists running around the house none stop for the last 24 hours. They all want your attention all the time. It's enough to drive anyone bananas ... anyway, I got up, and before I had time to pee or ANYTHING, I was asked to help my nephew with one of the computers ... so I did ... then I raced off to pee (because let's face it, when you get up, you're usually in need of relief anyway ... and where is the first place we all need to go ... ) Well, th nephew needing help with the computer wasn't too happy, and another one tried following me into the toilet! 'Go AWAY! I'm TRYING to PEE!!!!' Then, came back, helped with the computer some more ... then, because I was in a rush to get to the accountant, I decided to take a shower ... only, my nephews started calling out to me, knocking on the door etc. 'Come back! Come Back!' 'Go away, I'm trying to have a shower!' I heard my mother take them away. Then, suddenly I heard her call me! I was so frustrated at not being able to take a friggin' shower in peace ... and the fact I was now running late! It made me feel angry a little, and I thought, 'Gees, I so want to punch the wall with my fist right now!!!!' but, I didn't of course ... that would have broken my hand! I ain't dumb! :-) When I got out of the shower, I realised my mother had gone ot the front of the house. She'd called as she wanted me to watch my nephews while she went to look at the stuff we'd thrown out on the weekend ... grrrrr! I grabbed my tax and ran out the door ... only realisin then that I hadn't combed my hair! Arrrgh! Back inside ... combed hair ... off to the accountant!

*****

Anyway, we've had heaps of people coming around looking at the junk we've thrown out to be collected. It's funny, as they try not to look like they're going through your garbage. Other than my brother Jeff's two blinds, nothing of ours was taken. A lady did drop a stroller off the other day, and some guys came and took it almost immediately. I thought that was funny. She was pretending to be looking for stuff, and she pulled her junk out of her car and added it to ours. I thought, 'Geees, it's not like we'd tell you off for it. It's all going to the tip!' We thought someone had taken our old wheel barrow, but we found it a little while later ... someone had moved it underneath one of our pine trees out the front. Weird! So, back into the junk pile it went. When I arrived home from having my tax done, a guy was out the front with his Ute getting stuff, when he saw me arrive home and swore, raced back to his car and left! Weird! Like, we'd tell you off for stealing our garbage! Like, please take some of it, let us know someone somewhere is still getting use out of it. I feel a little let down though. Most of the charity places only take stuff that's in almost new condition now a days. So, even though our lounge suite was still in very good nick [other than the rat poo we'd cleaned off it and stuff], it's still going to the tip! I'm sure some poorer people [or Uni students ...] would have liked the lounge. Still, it hasn't been collected, so maybe someone will see it and take it.

****

People in Perth are without a doubt the worst drivers in Australia. I really get sick of the way most of them drive ... I have to admit, I miss Sydney drivers ... the traffic there was way worse, but at least most of the drivers could stay in their own lanes and didn't sit a foot off the back of your car.

*****

ANZAC day tomorrow. [Public Holiday]. I need the sleep ... but I fear my mother has more ideas. She has lots of things she wants to do with this place ... some of them even contradict each other [like adding a room, a swimming pool, stuff she wants done for the yard ... and maybe even adding another house. I keep telling her it won't all fit!] Anyway, she's been discussing us making another fence, and cementing the driveway ... hope it doesn't need to be done tomorrow ... cause I need the sleeeeeep! ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

Today! Saturday the 22nd April 2006.

Yes, more to complain about. Once again my mother got me to WORK before I got to have breakfast or anything. My brother Jeff and I threw a lot of stuff out. Two TV's. Old Carpet. Blinds. A lounge (which we were going to swap the two lounges, but the rats/mice had pee'd and pooped all over the one in the shed ... even though it had been wrapped in plastic! In the end, my brother suggested we throw both our laounges away and buy a brand new one!) An old rusted barrel. A wheel barrow. An ironing board. A microwave oven. And heaps more. Most of the stuff doesn't work anymore ... ANYWAT, I got peed off, as somehow my mother stood there accusing me of not doing any work, when I'd done the majority of the work when she wasn't there ... then, she went away, and Jeff took off to goodness knows where, and I was left doing the work ... and I thought, 'why is it my mother always claims I am lazy, yet is never here when I'm working? Yet, as soon as she does turn up, Jeff is somehow here and working!!!' I think my mother has an idea in her head, and she can't seem to break out of it either, as I was working damn hard at one stage, andshe showed up, and she still didn't seem to see that I was the one working, while Jeff was talking to her! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! Why do I bother? Anywat, I got them both back when I slaughtered them at scrabble and cluedo! [I love the fact that when I play cluedo I don't use the lists which come with the game, I just remember it all in my head!] :-)

*****

My cousin (who had the wedding) and his wife Tiana visited us today. Was pretty kewl! I gave them a disc of the photo's we'd taken (and a video Jeff accidentally took) and they let me copy another disc they had of photos. I spotted another photo of Serena, and I suspect she might be a Muslim, as she was dressed in normal type clothing, but with her headdress on still. Well, that'd probably stop any relationship before it starts. Anywat, had a great time and plenty of laughs with the cousins [do I call Tiana my cousin now? I guess so!] :-) There is another paintball session coming up soon. My legs still not 100%. I was trying a liottle runnin today, and it's still not letting me run at all ... still pain, and doesn't work right ... I think it needs a lot more rest. Finally got some time to myself, tonight (after the scrabble and stuff) and am able to update this blog ... and hopefully search some others.

No Sleep for Dabido - Bag - Quirky

Was awoken this morning by my mother banging on my bedroom door. 'David, are you asleep?' 'Yes.' 'Come out and help me with the lantana.' Yes, in spite of my obvious wounds from raking the verge the other day, I was awoken to cut back and clean up all the lantana in our front lawn. Well, we spent four hours doing it. In that time, I didn't get to eat or anything. I was pretty worn out by the end, because, as you might guess, I was doing the lions share of the heavy work. Anyway, a few interesting things occurred. I got some wood in my eye ... so I couldn't see, though my mother wouldnt' help me to the house to wash it out, she just kept telling my to go wash it out myself. So, I cautiously made my way inside and washed it out ... it was actually a large noticable chunk of wood too. We also found an old bag which had been chucked in the garden. I phoned the police and they came and picked it up. I noticed as they went throguh it all that several different ID's were in there. I am assuming the bag was full of peoples stuff from several bag snatchings in the area. I think the drivers license they pulled out had the address from someone from a suburb up the road from us. Anyway, my mother thanked me for all the work I did today, and she also noticed a few other things aroundthe house that I'd done ... amazing. Still, somehow it got turned into a 'Wow, you did all these things, how totally amazing considering how lazy you are', sort of sessions. I felt like saying, 'No, you've finally noticed I do actually do stuff around here.' Anyway, I should have been working on my own business. My mother still doesn't understand that my business doesn't just rake money in on it's own. Somehow, she still has the opinion that I am here in order to do her bidding when she needs it! Grrrrr! Finally, just a quick quirky test! :-)

Your Quirk Factor: 58%

You're a pretty quirky person, but you're just normal enough to hide it. Congratulations - you've fooled other people into thinking you're just like them!

How Quirky Are You?

Thy Cousins Wedding Parte the Third - The Steed

Sire, thy steed awaits! Yes, at last, the much promised pictures of the LIMO!!! CMOS and Snark may want to have a ride (and maybe a few other bloggers I know) ... Get out on the highway! Heavy metal thunder! Looking for adventure, and whatever comes our way! :-)

Heraldry Thingies

Thought I'd stick both the Heradldric pictures which are on my knights costume on here so that you can have a better look at them. First is the bear rampant which I designed twenty odd years ago. Second is the Unicorn which I stole from my Warhammer Fantasy army stuff! Hope it doesn't look like a seashell any more! ;-)

Thy Cousinth Wedding Parte The Secondeth!

Here is some shots of us before going to the wedding. This one you can clearly see the Unicorn on my left breast (whcih is on the right). I thought I'd bought white paint for the Unicorn, but it was glitter, which now sort of looks glittery yellow. I should get a better shot of it so you can all see it as it's supposed to look! [Otherwise Heddon will say it still looks like a sea shell]. Here is a great shot of my mother looking shocked.! Hee hee! In fact, this is the second shot. The first one makes her look even more shocked! My brother Jeff took them both! Hee hee! Here is Jeff, the Knight who says 'Ni' and a lot of other things ... then says some more ... won't shut up ... keeps talking ... doesn't make any sense, confuses himself and just won't shut the FRIG UP! ... oh wait, he's not talking in the photo! You'll have to take my word, he normally doesn't shut up! ;-) Remember how I said I didn't have any shots of Serena ... well, here is one of her standing right at the back of a photo I'd taken ... only she's looking away from us all. So we can't see her face! Oh well. Here are some more of the wedding guests. Esterina [blue dress] and her Beau David [to her left] are in the foreground with backs turned to us. I dont' remember anyone elses names! :-) Bodoh Dabido! These are off my mother's camera. I'll add more shots later ... especially the much anticipated steed they left in. :-) [aka the limo ... but, you still have to wait ... maybe tomorrows post]. :-)

Bruised & Blistered!

Remember a few weeks ago when I couldn't walk and I spoke about playing paintball hurting my leg. Yep, I was just running along and the muscle decided to spasm and stuff and down I went in pain. Well, this is the bruise which materialised after the swelling went down. In fact, the bruise looked different on different days. I'm walking fine now, though I haven't taken my leg for a run ... well, i tried some accelerated walking yesterday when I was in the city, and I was still getting some pain and trouble from it, so I slowed down to a dawdle again. This photo doesn't come close to showing the actual amount of pain I was in! OUCH! Do you remember my mother asking me to rake up all the leaves and stuff on the verge? Well you should, it was one of yesterdays posts. [No, not the Eligable Blogger of the Year one!] Well, the raking caused a number of blisters on my hands, and this one on my thumb burts, leaving quite a hole. I have a smaller one on my left hand, but it's no where near as impressive. Anyway, I think you should read yesterdays post and do some of the questions. I'm dying to hear some witty responses! Stop taking the 'Most Eligible Blogger' post so seriously! :-)

Most Eligible Bloggers of the Year.

Seems Cleo is having their 'Most Eligible Bachelor' of the year thingy at the moment, I thought we should get a 'Most Eligible Blogger' thing going ... and let's not leave out the females, let's make this a total pimpfest where everyone can join in and add their own crap stuff to the mix. I went through about half of the 'eligible bachelors' in order to grab the questions. [Many repetative questions in that mix!] I've changed them slightly in order make them less sexist. I did suggest something like this on FireAngels blog, but lets face it, I get ignored where ever I go [yes, please keep playing that 'worlds smallest violin', I still can't hear it] :-) So, if you decide to join in the pimpfest, then please follow these simple rules to make it look similar to Cleo.

1. Include Photo
2. Include Profile
3. Include answers to at least five questions from the 15 below. [You can answer all 15 if you so wish!]
4. You can only pimp yourself (as your friends obviously won't know the answers to your questions)
5. Grab the next number and stick a link to your site in the comments section. If due to some unfortunately timing, two bloggers happen to grab the same number, we will consider them twins and will glue them together at the hip for a week.

Without further delay, here is my attempt (and answers to ALL the questions. WARNING: Any one taking my answers seriously will be forced to read 'War and Peace' in it's original Russian ... followed by 'Crime and Punishment' in Swahili)

	BLOGGER NO.	:	1
	NAME	:	David-Lee Stevenson
	OCCUPATION	:	Artist/Writer/Musician/Traing Facilitator/Network Engineer
	AGE	:	40
	ZODIAC	:	Gemini
	FAVE HANGOUT	:	My Study / Office
	TALENT	:	No thanks, I have plenty already.

1.A woman/man [select sex you are attracted to] is most beautiful when… She isn't beating the crap out of me. 2.The nicest thing a man/woman’s ever said about me is… 'Can you stop standing on my foot ... oh wait, that's not your leg.' 3.What scares you? Spiders, aliens with rectal probes, snakes, spiders and snakes with rectal probes. 4. Men/Women [Chose your sex] make the worst… Omlette. They are difficult to get into the blender and often scream when I turn it on ... and the red mush just doesn't seem to cook the same as eggs either. 5.Three most important things in my wallet/purse: Money, visa card, alien rectal probe deterant. 6.Describe your date from hell. Well, she was hot, but only because she was from the fires of hades itself. Took ages to put the darn thing out. Of course I had help, two firemen, a fire extinguisher. Then the bitch didn't even give me a good night kiss as they drove her off to the burns unit! 7.A wife-beater is... Someone who beat a woman into marrying them in the first place! Leave the F*CKER you idiot woman!!!! 8.What is an antimacassar? A decorative cloth Grandmothers hang off their chairs. Usually it is used to catch young peoples hair on in order to make wigs for old people. 9. I know she’s special when… She has a glossy coat, nice teeth and doesn't growl when I pat her on the head. 10. Which reality show would you like to be on? The Fattest Loser. I need the weight loss! [Yes, yes, it's called 'The Biggest Loser' I know!] 11.Being successful to me means… All the pizza I can eat without getting fat! 12.Three most important things in my bag: Her personality, her body and how she performs in bed ... um ... I just shot myself in the foot didn't I? No, make that shot in the head! 13. What were you teased about as a child? Being a child. Adults can be so cruel! 14. I added this question in to see if you were paying attention. Were you? No, not at all. 15. If I could trade places with a blogger for a day, I’d pick… Lainie Yeoh - just so I can play with her boobs all day! [Besides, I'd like to see her mind from the inside. I mean, why take drugs?] [Apologies to Lainie for that last one ... you know I love you long time!] ;-)

It's the 18th

Yes, today is the 18th of April. My last post was the 13th ... but did anyone come here saying 'Update! Update!' No!!!! I'm very upset! :-) Well, not really. hee hee I think this is the longest I've been without an update since I started blogging. Basically, I was doing family easter type things, as well as working today, followed by me going into the city to buy some stuff, and return some cello books to the music library. I was planning on doing an animation of Jesus kicking the stone away from his burial chamber and having ten Roman soldiers go flying like bowling pins ... but, I just didn't have the time! Waaaaah! Maybe next year. Anyway, now you know what I had planned and didn't do. Isn't life like that, you make plans, and you don't get around to it, and then there is no time left! Brief summary of my last few days: Friday - Ate hot crossed buns. [First bread I've eaten in ages] Spent time painting up my Warhammer High Elf army. Mainly chariots and some mages. Spent time with the family. Saw 'The Passion of the Christ'. Saturday - big family arguments and stuff. My mother went beserk trying to get us to do housework and fix stuff around the house. I still have the verge to rake up tomorrow. Funny, my mother couldn't take 'Yes' for an answer on that one. 'David, will you rake the verge up on Wednesday' 'Yes' 'David, will you rake the verge up on Wednesday' 'Yes' 'David, will you rake the verge ... ' 'Yes' 'David, will you rake the verge ...' 'Yes' 'David, will you rake ...' 'Yes, I said Yes already!' 'But I don't want you mowing it, I want you to rake it all up and I want you to rake it in a specific way.' 'I said Yes already. Okay?' 'But I want you to rake it up. And I want you to put it where I am pointing.' 'Yes, fine.' 'No, look where I am pointing.' 'Yes, I am.' 'No, look where I am pointing.' 'I did!' 'Where did I point?' 'Behind the bushes in the garden.' 'Yes, but I want you to put it where I am pointing.' 'I already know where you want it.' She walked off in a huff. An hour later we had the same conversation, only I was a little more pee'd off by it and told her to stop asking me. Is everyones mother like this? I wonder if it's some weird insanity that runs in my family. If it's not, then it's certainly sending ME insane! Waaaah! Sunday - Family HELL day. My mother asked me if I was going to do the verge on Wednesday again ... about five times!!!! Took the easter eggs and stuff over to my sisters. We arrived early, as my sister asked us too. I spent time with the nephews. Had three of them hanging off me at one stage, the eight year old on my back, the 3 1/2 year old in one arm, and the 2 year old one in the other!!! OUCH!!!! Heavy! Not that they care, they were having fun killing their uncle. :-) We sat down and played Billionaire for a while, as we were waiting for my other brother's family to arrive. Eventually they did. We all had fish and chips for dinner. [Fattening]. Now, the ugly part of the whole thing ... the nasty family politic stuff. My mother sent Jeff and I to the shops early in the day to get drinks and nibblies etc. I was entertaining the nephews at the time, but my mother insisted I go with Jeff. Basic assumption from both Jeff and myself was that my mother was going to bad mouth us behind our backs. My mother had got pee'd off with my attitude apparently. [Always saying 'YES' I think!] Plus, we had another incedent on Saturday, when my mother came to give me a detailed blow by blow report about the football [Aussie Rules] which I have no interest in. Some of you might remember that I keep telling my mother I'm not interested. Well, same thing happened, I told her I have no interest in football, and she went balistic at me! So, she had plenty to complain about apparently. NEXT, my sister spent most of the time putting my brother Jeff down. Something my mother noted. THEN, after my other brother and family arrived, my sister changed targets and my sister and other brother deciced it was 'put mum down' time. Mainly this was my sister. My sister turned to me and asked, 'David, did't mum hit us when we were kids.' I said, 'Yes.' Simple, because, well, it was true, both our parents used to hit us. My mother gave me a look like daggers. Like I'd stabbed her in the back, but, what can I do, I had answered the question truthfully. Anyway, my sister then went on to use the fact that my mother used to hit us as an excuse for why she hits her kids. I think it's wrong to hit kids at all. After all, if you're the parents, then you should know better. Hitting kids is a sign you've lost control of the situation. So, really, you're punishing your kids for your own problem. [Yes, go get a parenting course if you're havin problems. I'm not claiming everyone is perfect and can handle every situation ... just, don't hit your kids if you're not handling them ... go learn to handle them.] Anyway, they also had a 'mum's so fat' session and stuff. End result, when we got home, Jeff and I had to listen to mum complain for two hours over HER treatment at the hands of my sister and other brother. It really was HELL in one way, but Jeff and I got to re-live it ... thankfully, when the 'mum hitting us' bit came up, my mother didn't aim it at me, she admitted that she's made mistakes in her life as a parent. Yes, she was 100% correct. I don't blame her for that. Of the two of my parents, I can understand my mother hitting us when we were bad (as she only did it when we'd done something wrong). She shouldn't have hit us, but at least she can see the error now that she's learnt more about parenting. My father on the other hand used to use any excuse to belt into us (believe me, getting the strap wasn't fun. That man left welts on my behind because he used to hit so hard). Anyway, his usual excuse for hitting me was, 'Something I didn't catch you doing.' In other words, I hadn't done anything wrong, he just wanted something to beat into ... a thirty year old man getting his jollies by beating a six year old kid for no reason isn't a fair fight. ANYWAY, when my family starts to attack each other like that, defend their own inadequacies instead of fixing them, and just bringing up bad memories gallore, I just wish I'd never left Sydney. I just wonder if this is a fair situation to find ourselves in. On top of that, my mother is scared that my elder brother might come over here from Adelaide, simply as he wrote, 'See you soon' in the birthday card they sent her (which was almost a moth late ... pttth!) Anyway, she doesn't want him coming over, and she keeps inventing sceanarios where he's going to turn up on our doorstep and all hell will break loose. She was sure it was going to be at Easter ... now she's sure it will be the ANZAC day long weekend. It's crazy!!!! I wish she could stop ... but, I guess she can't! Monday - du to the mood in the house, I thought it better to spend more time with the family and stuff, so I didn't get on my computer to do anything ... thus the lack of update yesterday. Spent the day painting my Warhammer Brettonian Knights. Tuesday - today ... read above ... work, into city, blah blah. So ... how was your Easter?

Happy Easter Everyone.

Hope everyone has a safe and happy easter. Watch out for exploding bunnies! :-) [And don't forget, Friday you get to eat some hot crossed bunnies!]

Cravings ... for ... fast ... food ...

I have this weird craving for a Cheese and Spinach pie. The worst thing about this, is I don't actually LIKE them that much. I haven't had one in AGES, yet the craving still persists! Does it mean my body craves spinach? Or is it craving dairy products like cheese?! Waaaaah! PLUS, cheese and spinach pies are FATTENING! Like, the last thing I need is to get any fatter. At present I could stand on one end of a battleship while Cher entertains the troups at the other end, and I'll still end up making the ship sink at my end! Waaaah!

*****

I haven't got my mother's photos of the wedding yet, so I'll just have to talk about the wedding soem more with no photos. Some interesting people & events at the wedding. First of all, my Auntie Judy and Uncle Dave went. They haven't spoken to my Grandmother (Nana) in many years, as my Aunt Judy tries to control and manipulate everyone as though she's the Queen. [The phrase, 'She thinks she's the Queen of England', is often said by people in my family in reference to her]. Anyway, the real short version of this tale is this: 1. My Aunt and Nana are talking again. 2. My Uncle thanked my mother for her part in getting them talking again. 3. People are already complaining that my Aunt is trying to manipulate my Nana again, whcih is why they stopped talking in the first place. [In fact, it was suggested that Nana might cut her off again and refuse to talk to her ...] It was interesting that Nana didn't recognise her at first without a hat on, as she'd never seen her with grey hair! Another person we ran into who was a blast from the past, was my cousin Clifton's mother, Kerry. It was sort of niceto see her again. My last memory of her was when she asked if I was 'trying to be one of the Beatles' because I was growing my hair when I was about eleven years old. Now, Kerry's cousin Julie was also there and has a weird connection with my family. My Uncle John used to date her BEFORE he dated Kerry. The reason for the Uncle John and Julie break up was this: My Uncle John bought Julie over to our house for a visit. While my mother and Uncle were in the kitchen, my father (being the arsehole that he was), stuck his hand up Julie's dress and basically hit on her. Julie didn't do anything about it. My mother walked in while it was happening ... result, John and Julie left immediately, my mother and father had a massive arguement over it all. So, Julie was at the wedding, and of course my parents are divorced and everything, so my father wasn't there. All through the reception Julies making weird/stupid comments regarding me and my mother. Twice my mother informed Julie that I was her son, NOT her second husband. Julie kept giving me dirty looks and making sexual comments regarding me and my mother. Then she made some comments about me chasing my mother around in a thong, and I said to her, 'Why would I do that to my mother?' My mother AGAIN reminded Julie that I was her son, and NOT her husband. The stupid girl blushed and after that she didn't make stupid sexual comments and had even stopped giving me dirty looks. I embarrased her again later in the night when someone mentioned she could speak Japanese. She gave us some explaination that she did Karate for a few years, and as such could understand fluent Japanese, though she was bad at speaking it. Being me, I immediately thought, 'Kewl, someone to talk Japanese to', and as such, I immediately said to her, 'Osaka Ben Ga Wakara Hen.' She was like, 'Huh?' So I translated for her. It become apparent that her Japanese is a lot less than mine (and I never claim I can speak or understand it fluently), so I think she thought no one could speak it. [Unless of course having meet someone who can speak the language automatically makes us fluent ... in which case, think of all the languages we can all speak!] :-) Anyway, she was alright after that. Everyone seemed very pleasant and everything. Anyway, I wasn't completely happy with the table I'd been sat at. For one, it consisted of all the sixty year old people, with the exception of my brother and a cousins from the brides side & his wife. The cousin and wife soon left and joined another table. So Jeff and I were with the over sixties. Of course, my mind was one another table which had Serena at it ... only, I had no reason to go to that table, as I didn't know anyone there! OUCH! As I said in a previous post though, as soon as they announced the rennaissance dancing, I was over to Serena in a flash and asked her to dance. That's enough about Serena in case Kenny thinks I'm in love again! Anyway, we had rennaissance dancing, which was followed by all the inane speaches etc. My cousin Clifton was a real good host, getting around and seeing that everything was good. My Uncle Dave kept shaking his head at me drinking Johnny Walker scotch. Not sure what his complaint was, it's the first drink I've had since my mother's sixtieth birthday (which was over a year ago). I really don't drink that much ... the 375ml bottle of sctoch wasn't enough to get me drunk anyway. [I don't drink to get drunk]. When they ran out of coke, I had to have a Scotch and Lemonade! That's the basic dirt and everything. Not much else to say other than we all seemed to enjoy it all ... though, I'd still rather be in Sydney!!! :-)

Thy Cousinth Wedding [Parte The Firste]

Ye Verily with greetings and salutations oh Lords and Ladies of the realm. Welcometh to thy Cousinth Prince Clifton's Wedding to young Nubile Princess Tiana. In the picture belowth, we see the Lords and Ladies arriving for the festivities. In the fore groundth we see-ith my Bro in Law Kim, my sister in-law Nerali, and young Esterina [whom you might recall wasth the Herald whom came to announceth the wedding ... some sayth she is one nut caketh! (but she's a very nice person)]. In picture next, we findeth my Aunty Judith, and my mother Lady Jeanette. The young Prince made a brief PRE-WEDDING appearance beforeth the nuptuals commenceth. [I think giving instructions to some people]. Mia Familia, [my family] from left to right, my Brother Sir Paul of the crude joke, my youngest brother Sir Jeff of the bottomless stomach, my sister Lady Angella of the many kids, her husband Monsenior Monk Kim the uncelebate with lots of kids, and my sister in-law (Paul's wife), Lady Nerali of the frizzy hair department ... or something like that. Same sort of thing, only this time, Paul took the picture and Sir Dabido [me] of the never ending comment has replaced him in the picture. [You can't see my Unicorn in this one!] Justine, the violinist. He played many a rennaissance, medieval, total evil tune to our delight. Well worth whatever they paid for him. A quick look at the wedding area. It's called 'The Rose Gardens', but not one rose was growing there ... good thing I got to meet Serena, whom I think is a rose. [But dont' read too much into that!] More of the carousing Lords, Ladies and pretend monks. Notice far right, Ashley dressed as Frodo Baggins ... and they didn't even let him carry the ring for fear he'd run off with it and throw it into the cracks of doom! My Nana, Lady Doris (aka Dot). Matriarch of the Elven clan (yes, you might remember that my mother's side of the family have the surname ELVEN ... we are descended from Elves, which explains the fact we are all short arses!) ;-) More Lords and Ladies ... though Dom looks like he's escaped from the Matrix with his get up. The Groom and Besteth man appeareth. They had a lot of steps to walk down. The Marriage Celebrant and the Soloist. Waiting for the bride. [Never take a photo into the sun, else it looks like God is shining on everything.! ;-)] The Bridesmaid appears at the bottom steps. Looks like a Female Frodddddooooo! ;-) The Bride Lady Tiana appears. [I just realised something about this photo ... Serena would be in it ... except she is RIGHT behind seom people at this point! Bwahahaaa! No photo of Serena to show you all! Silly me!] The vows! Most important ... don't fall asleep King John. Celtic binding ceremony. I wish the camera was still operating after this, but alas, it stopped! Waaaah! Doesn't matter, my mother has more on her camera ... more photo's to come! ;-) Here, Nana ties a blue ribbon to their arms [blue represented something ... faithfulness I think ... or just blueberry ice cream ... something important]. Anyway, the wedding continued after my camera's failure, and about six ribbons in all were tied on the couple. [Not as sexy as fluffy handcuffs, but probably not as scarey either!] :-) Hopefully, I will get my mother's camera soon, and we can have a look at the photo's she took (hopefully it will include a photo of Serena somewhere), plus, you really do need to have a look at the steed which carried them away to the reception! ;-)

Pre-Wedding & a Little About the Wedding.

As you may know, it was my Cousins Clifton's wedding yesterday. For those who remember, I stuck the photo of Esterina on the website before when she came around dressed as a squire to read the invitation and everything. Well, they took that costume, and they stuck it on a dummy they'd made (not me). This is it prior to being set up. Anyway, they put the dummy at the entrance to the wedding reception with a speaker inviting everyone in. :-) They then stuck fairy lights all over the clothes line. It looked great at night at the reception. :-) They also put up some metal dragons and other things. I'm glad I took this photo the day before the wedding, as you couldn't see them at night. This is the Marquee they put up to house all the wedding guests. It's a little empty at present. ;-) This is it from another angle. On the night it was full of tables and chairs and stuff. :-) Meanwhile inside, I got to see all the mugs and cups and stuf they'd snagged from all the local op-shops for us to drink out of. I sort of felt a little dirty drinking out of a tankard that might have been ... well, goodness knows where!!! But, they certainly made the feast seem medieval. ;-) My Nana's birthday was on the same day as the wedding, so we had a small celebration before hand. My now cousin in law Tiana bought an ice cream cake for nana, and we all had a slice. :-) This is Nana. She's 86 years young. :-) My cousin Clifton was still making things the day before the wedding. He constructed four thrones fo the bridal party to be seated at. ;-) Here is the one he had finished while I was there. [I might add, I wasn't helping at all ... just bumming around a bit.] ;-) Here is my mother talking to my cousin Clifton as he's making the other three thrones. His hands are sort of blue from painting the first one. More photo's to come, as I want to talk about the wedding. Actually, the main thing I'd like to talk about, is I met a really nice girl names Serena. I got to dance some Medieval dances (a Pavan, and two other sorts). It wasn't easy on my leg (as you know I'm still injured!) , especially the dances where we had to skip and hop around. Anyway, from the moment I saw her, I thought she was really cute. I hope I didn't give her to many weird stares while at the wedding. I think I might have looked deep into her eyes once or twice, or three or four times during the night ... silly me. It only occurred to me later that maybe I was looking a little stupid or doe eyed! My mother asked me in a 'knowing sort of a way' if I'd met anyone new. I said, 'Oh yeah, a few new people'. Maybe I ws being too obvious or something ... after all, as soon as they announced that Dancin was about to start, I headed from my table straight over to the girl, and asked her if she would dance with me. My brother and Aunt Judy were behind me most of the dance time, so I didn't make any moves on her. Last thing I wanted was family interference if they decided they didn't approve. I jsut kept thinking, geees, how am I going to see this girl again, I have no pen to write my name and phone number down with, and I don't have an up to date business card! Arrrrgh! I didn't want to say anything to obvious in front of the family. Otherwise, I might have asked her for her details, or later (as she left early) I could have asked Tiana or Clifton for her details. But ... I guess those are the breaks. Stupidly, I should have asked how she knew Tiana & Clifton ... but I didn't. I just made stupid jokes all through the dances and stuff ... and she was polite enough to laugh at them, and she has a wonderful smile. She has a perfect Aussie accent, so I assume she grew up here. She looks like she might be Indonesian, or Malay, or maybe even Burmese or something. You know, the Southern / South West Asia pacific /Indian Ocean type of looking person. She wasn't too much shorter than me either. Damn! I better stop talking about her, otherwise you mith think I'm in love or something. Anyway, after I got home, I suddenly realised that I could have used the pen at the 'Bridal Book' to write my name / number etc. Frig! Frig! Frig! Why did my brain kick in after I got home? Stupid ME!!!! It's weird, as I didn't do my normal choke thing, where I run away from the girl ... instead, I was more conscious of the family all being around! I wonder if that means anything ... Now I have a dilema! How will I get to meet her again????? Or worse, does she like me? Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!!!!

#628 - And this time, it's personal!

Yes, I'm up to post 628. It's not a significant number ... no zero's after it ... nothing to do with Life The Universe and Everything [Still havent' seen the Hitch hikers Movie] ... not a fibonacci number. Nothing remotely significant about it ... so, let's all celebrate post number 628 for what it is. A post on my personal blog, and not much more. I was pondering what to write today. Todays events - played chauffeur for my mother ... picked up her outfit for the wedding, discovering it was TEAL and NOT BOTTLE GREEN like we though. Drove her around to get more material to remake her hat and bag for the outfit. Went and checked out my cousins pavillions and stuff for his wedding ... celebrated Nana's 86th Burpday. Lots of controversy over the new Industrial Relation Laws where people just get sacked for no reason. We're back in the days of Ebenezer Scrooge. I like how one employer described it the other day, 'The gun is in the hands of the employer.' So, we're now in crisis, people getting sacked left right and centre just because management can't be bothered being good managers of people, and can just sack anyone that doesn't tow their line. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, Australia has very poor managers, and there is a tendency to not train them. In fact, from my experience, there is a tendancy in Australian business to avoid any legitamate training what so ever. The reason I was given at the last place I worked, was that if the company actually spent the money on quality training for their employees, another company would snatch them up. In other words, they prefer to send the employees on 'crap training' that does little or nothing for the employee, keeping them at a basic level of of skill so the company doesn't have to pay them more for their improved skill level, and making them almost 'unhirable' to other firms. It's stupid, it's counter productive, and it also causes a lot of those employees to leave and go elsewhere. I know, as I've been subjected to some of the most inane training ever. Once, we basically sat there for the day while a lady read out stories from 'Chicken Soup for the Soul'. It would have been cheaper to have bought all the employees acopy of 'Chicken Soup for the Soul', and probably more productive. Other than making us feel good for a day or so, it didn't enhance our skills, it didn't improve morale, and it didn't help the company in any way other than to get them a receipt to prove they'd spent their money on training. [NOTE: Australian businesses have to put aside a certain percentage of an employees wage in order to invest in training.] So, we're back in the old draconian days, where employees can be sacked on the spot with no warning, and no reason. The Government thinks that's a good thing. Some employers think it's a good thing, and some don't. Most employees think it is a bad thing, and the cases which are coming to the publics attention are proving that. The worst thing, is to take an employer to court over an unfair dismissal will cost about $30,000 up front ... and you may not even win the case. Between these new laws and the fact they can phone tap anyone or arrest people without charges, I wonder how long before the public wakes up and realises we're in Nazi Australia! We have some laws which, as they say, a third world dictatorship would wish they had. I can only see sad times ahead! What happened to Democracy where the people ruled, and the Government were supposed to be servants to the people? We're now in times where the Government is despotism, and the people are becoming slaves to the Governing peoples! Fairwell Democracy, you were a nice idea, but alas, you are dead, but I hope not gone!

Rat story sounds even better like this ...

Click the link to hear the rat story told in a differnet fashion. I think it Sounds Better in this translation. Thanks to my Homey Nik in tha UK fo' dis one! So rizzy it yo mothas! [I have no idea what i just said!] :-)

Rats in the Roof

Was sort of interesting last night. For ages I've been telling my mother we've had things living in the roof which are much heavier than the mice problems we've had. For ages my mother wouldn't believe me. Last night, my mother woke us all up claiming someone was trying to break in via the roof. I went down to her end of the house, and I told her, 'No, that's the rat's I've been telling you that we have.' She was unconvinced. My brother Jeff basically repeated the same thing to her. He's been hearing them for ages as well. Anyway, these rats were partying hard up in the roof, and I got the ladder for my brother to have a look. My mother kept making comments like, 'We're calling the police' and stuff. She still insisted it was a human being up there. I waited, anf my brother was too scared to have a look, so I climbed the ladder with my bad leg and had a look. I got the torch, and shone it around. Sure enough, lots of beady little eyes glowing at me ... then, they decided to charge my way. Yes, those rats didn't want me interupting their party. So, I closed the roof, and climbed down. 'It's rats mum,' I told my mother. 'Really? They must be bloody big to sound like a human.' 'Uh .. yeah, sure mum!' Well, they weren't, they're just normal sized river rats. Anyway, more rat sack wil be needed to be placed in the roof to get rid of them. It's a bit weird, we've had a few plagues of things lately, and I can't explain it. Mice, millipedes, rats, spiders ... yet we have heaps of traps, poisons and other things down ... still, they keep coming. I'm wondering if someone has been breeding them with the hope of trying to remove us from this property. We've also experienced a heap of trees dying out the back near the fence line. My mother is 100% positive that the guy over the back has been poisoning them, as they were there for years without a problem, then after he moved in, all our trees near his fence started dying. Anyway, at least I've finally proven that we do have rats in the roof, so I won't get any arguements from my mother about it. I know, I've seen the little things scurrying about ...

Fatter Than EVAR!!!

I really need to marry an Accountant. Not that accounting is hard. It's not difficult at all ... just, I'd prefer to do creative things. Anyway, I set up all my reporting in easy to use spreadsheets yesterday so that I won't take as long as I need to in future. I weighed myself yesterday ... and I'm back to 100kg! WTFrigg!!!! That's the MOST I've ever weighed in my life ... and I'm back there!!! OWWWWWW! I just weighed myself then ... and I'm at 101kg ... that's a NEW FAT RECORD for me! OWWWWWW! I blame this stupid leg. When I got up this morning, a huge yellow and greenish coloured bruise was on the back of my leg. It'snow not as noticable, but it's still there, and the leg still hurts! OUCH!!!! Once I get the leg functioning again, I'll be able to exercise and get rid of the flab!!! I AM SO FAT. Even whales stand next to me just to look thin. [Yes, I realise whales don't have a leg to stand on!] ONE ONE ONE ONE !!!!!111111wanwanwanwanwan!!!!1111ELEVENELEVEN Worst thing is, I am HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY ... like a friggin' hippo that escaped from fatland while eating a million jelly donuts with room for a million more in it's tummy!!!!! Soooo hungry!!!! I better finish my business reporting and stuff and fax it through ... else, I'll incur fines or have my business shut down! But ... I'm ... so ... hungry ... ...

Why Blog when you can do these things ...

Why Blog when you can do these things ... That's right, I've been busy preparing my Quarterly Business Activity Statement for the Tax Man ... as well as other TAX stuff and well, writing out an updated resume. I've done the visit to the usual 30 to 40 blogs today, and well ... I really didn't get up to much. So, without further adieu, here is some quick simple quizzes I did, and the answers. [PS, grabbed the first one from Messy Christian's site ... just to give credit where credit is due].

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have high conscientiousness. Intelligent and reliable, you tend to succeed in life. Most things in your life are organized and planned well. But you borderline on being a total perfectionist. Agreeableness: You have high agreeableness. You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly. Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone. You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism. You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic. Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy. Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is high. In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas. You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits. A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.

The Five Factor Personality Test

Your Observation Skills Get An A+

You have perfect observation skills... Or perfect skils for Googling quiz answers!

How Observant Are You?

Your Hair Should Be Purple

Intense, thoughtful, and unconventional. You're always philosophizing and inspiring others with your insights.

What's Your Funky Inner Hair Color?

People Envy Your Ingenuity

You're a person with unique ideas, big plans, and a zany outlook on life. Many people look to you for inspiration. People envy your creativity and "who cares?" attitude. They feel very ordinary next to you - and they usually are!

What Do People Envy About You?

You Are Lisa Simpson

A total child prodigy and super genius, you have the mind for world domination. But you prefer world peace, Buddhism, and tofu dogs. You will be remembered for: all your academic accomplishments Your life philosophy: "I refuse to believe that everybody refuses to believe the truth"

The Simpsons Personality Test