Seems Cleo is having their 'Most Eligible Bachelor
' of the year thingy at the moment, I thought we should get a 'Most Eligible Blogger' thing going ... and let's not leave out the females, let's make this a total pimpfest where everyone can join in and add their own
stuff to the mix.
I went through about half of the 'eligible bachelors' in order to grab the questions. [Many repetative questions in that mix!] I've changed them slightly in order make them less sexist.
I did suggest something like this on FireAngels
blog, but lets face it, I get ignored where ever I go [yes, please keep playing that 'worlds smallest violin', I still can't hear it] :-)
So, if you decide to join in the pimpfest, then please follow these simple rules to make it look similar to Cleo.
- Include Photo
- Include Profile
- Include answers to at least five questions from the 15 below. [You can answer all 15 if you so wish!]
- You can only pimp yourself (as your friends obviously won't know the answers to your questions)
- Grab the next number and stick a link to your site in the comments section. If due to some unfortunately timing, two bloggers happen to grab the same number, we will consider them twins and will glue them together at the hip for a week.
Without further delay, here is my attempt (and answers to ALL the questions. WARNING: Any one taking my answers seriously will be forced to read 'War and Peace' in it's original Russian ... followed by 'Crime and Punishment' in Swahili)
1.A woman/man [select sex you are attracted to] is most beautiful when…
She isn't beating the crap out of me.
2.The nicest thing a man/woman’s ever said about me is…
'Can you stop standing on my foot ... oh wait, that's not your leg.'
3.What scares you?
Spiders, aliens with rectal probes, snakes, spiders and snakes with rectal probes.
4. Men/Women [Chose your sex] make the worst…
||BLOGGER NO. ||: ||1
||NAME ||: ||David-Lee Stevenson
||OCCUPATION ||: ||Artist/Writer/Musician/Traing Facilitator/Network Engineer
||AGE ||: ||40
||ZODIAC ||: ||Gemini
||FAVE HANGOUT ||: ||My Study / Office
||TALENT ||: ||No thanks, I have plenty already.
are difficult to get into the blender and often scream when I turn it on ... and the red mush just doesn't seem to cook the same as eggs either.
5.Three most important things in my wallet/purse:
Money, visa card, alien rectal probe deterant.
6.Describe your date from hell.
Well, she was hot, but only because she was from the fires of hades itself. Took ages to put the darn thing out. Of course I had help, two firemen, a fire extinguisher. Then the bitch didn't even give me a good night kiss as they drove her off to the burns unit!
7.A wife-beater is...
Someone who beat a woman into marrying them in the first place! Leave the F*CKER you idiot woman!!!!
8.What is an antimacassar?
A decorative cloth Grandmothers hang off their chairs. Usually it is used to catch young peoples hair on in order to make wigs for old people.
9. I know she’s special when…
She has a glossy coat, nice teeth and doesn't growl when I pat her on the head.
10. Which reality show would you like to be on?
The Fattest Loser. I need the weight loss! [Yes, yes, it's called 'The Biggest Loser' I know!]
11.Being successful to me means…
All the pizza I can eat without getting fat!
12.Three most important things in my bag:
Her personality, her body and how she performs in bed ... um ... I just shot myself in the foot didn't I? No, make that shot in the head!
13. What were you teased about as a child?
Being a child. Adults can be so cruel!
14. I added this question in to see if you were paying attention. Were you?
No, not at all.
15. If I could trade places with a blogger for a day, I’d pick…
Lainie Yeoh - just so I can play with her boobs all day! [Besides, I'd like to see her mind from the inside. I mean, why take drugs?]
[Apologies to Lainie for that last one ... you know I love you long time!] ;-)