The Blog of Dabido (the Baka one). Everything in this blog is copyrighted. Copyright 2004, 2005, 2006 by D. Stevenson.

11 December, 2005

Tokyo Gay Hamster Wars Part Nine (An Anime without brain power)

After their night out, Niku, Deibetto, Meg, Mel and the ironing board eventually arrived at Deib's home. Deibs and Niku eventually got the struggling ironing board into the apartment. It had found ways and means to lodge itself in awkward positions in the hallway and doorways. Whilst doing this, Meg and Mel slipped quietly away. When constructing the units, Deibs had used some of his own biology to build the units. They were designed to run off oxygen and glycerine in a similar way to human physiology. They had backup systems, but they still needed to maintain their intake of O two and sugar. In order to transport the oxygen around their systems, Deibetto had used some of his own blood. Unfortunately, the mechanical units had very little in place to reproduce their own blood, and as such needed replenish it as much as possible when their blood began to become old and ineffectual. Due to Deibetto's blood type, they could only use A negative blood. Niku had programmed it in, so that the units could detect people wit this blood type. What neither of them suspected, was that the units would seek a secondary source for their blood. So as Deibetto and Niku struggled with the ironing board, the two units quietly slipped away to find a late night snack. There was something Deibetto did not know that he had in common with his landlady, Tanaka San, blood type! Meg and Mel had used their sensors and spotted the scent of A negative blood almost immediately. Top floor, landlady apartment, light off. Tanaka San was sleeping, or at least trying to. Meg and Mel found the outside wall of the apartment easy to navigate. If anyone had been awake at that hour, they probably would have seen the silhouette of two sexy young ladies scaling the outside of the apartment. They got to Tanaka Sans window, and found it was not the sort to open. 'Balcony,' whispered Mel. 'Yes,' said Meg, confirming that there was indeed a balcony. 'No, we go in through the balcony.' 'Oh, I thought you were asking if there was a balcony.' 'I can already see the balcony. Why would I ask if there is one?' 'I don't know. Maybe your seeing thingies were malfunctioning.' 'My seeing thingies? You mean my eyes?' 'Yeah, your eyes. Those two seeing thingies on your face.' 'Get onto the balcony!' 'Okay, fine.' The girls leapt onto the balcony and found the sliding door was slightly open. After all, Tanaka San had reasoned that no one would climb all the way to the top of her apartment in order to break in. Not that any one would want to break in anyway, until now. Mel made her way to the bedroom and slowly opened the door a crack. It creaked with good fashioned atmospheric horror story type creaking. A folley department would have been proud of the effect. Mel peered through the crack to see Tanaka San sleeping on her mattress. Meg peered over the top of Mel's head, but had to push Mel down a little, which did not endear her to Mel in the slightest. The creaking had in fact awoken Tanaka San up, who now lay shivering with fear in her bed. She could feel the prescience of people in the apartment, and was hoping they were just there by mistake. No such luck. These were two hungry vampire robot units after a snack to keep themselves functioning in premium condition. It was Vampire Supper time! AND THIS TIME, IT WASN'T PERSONAL!!!! Well, not to the Vampies anyway! Mel pushed the door open, and both Meg and Mel leapt through the door together. They landed on the same spot knocking each other over. Mel landed head first on a small table next to Tanaka San's bed. With a titanium head, it wasn't much of an effort for the table to break into rather small pieces. 'Mel, you were supposed to go right!' 'This is the right! You were supposed to go left!' 'Oh, Okay.' Meg ran on little tippy toes around to the left hand side of the bed. 'Meg, why are you running on tippy toes, may I ask?' 'I didn't want to wake the lady up.' 'WAKE THE LADY UP? MY HEAD GOING THROUGH THE TABLE WASN'T ENOUGH?' 'Shhhhh, don't yell!' 'WHY THE FRIG NOT? THE ENTIRE APARTMENT BUILDING IS PROBABLY AWAKE ALREADY!' 'WELL, IF YOU CAN YELL, THEN I'M GOING TO YELL IN MY OWN DEFENSE THEN.' 'FINE! YELL YOU LITTLE HEART OUT! BUT IT WON'T RETRACT FROM THE FACT THAT YOU WENT RIGHT INSTEAD OF LEFT.' 'HUH! WHO MADE YOU BOSS? BESIDES, IT"S NOT MY FAULT IF I GOT SOME BAD DNA THAT CAN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LEFT AND RIGHT!' 'I'VE GOT THE SAME DNA ...' While the girls were arguing, Tanaka San slipped down the bed and out the bottom of the futon and crawled towards the door. 'HEY! OUR SNACK IS GETTING AWAY!' cried Meg. 'And so it is,' said Mel. 'Let's get her!' With that, they leapt next to Tanaka San, and lifted her off the floor so that her neck was level with their mouths. Both opened wide, and their fangs drew down from their teeth. Tanaka San shivered involuntarily, while her little legs ran in mid air trying to get away. Tanaka San let out an enormous scream, and both vampies bit into her neck from either side.