I think first of all, isn't it something of the same thing - if I want the girl, hasn't she already GOT what I want?
Well probably not. As F***stresses earlier post pointed out, there are females who have guys queueing up behind them, who are just total biatches once they have their claws into men. Yet, other sweet demure girls never seem to get the guys.
I could post on the psychology of why some people get chased all the time and why some perfectly good humans never get anyone chasing them. BUT, that's not tonights topic. [Why Ugly people, and total biatches/bastardos get people is another subject for another post!]
The question facing ME, is WHAT DO I WANT IN A WOMAN?
I've been meaning to post on this very subject since seeing Suanies Advertisment for herself
. I know a lot of people won't take F***stress' question too seriously, and to be honest, she is IMHO only half serious. Still, I think it is a legitimate question which deserves some thought and at least some serious answers.
The short cop-out answer to these sorts of questions are -
- Someone who completes me!
- A perfect partner.
- Someone who loves me for being ME.
I'm not going to try to pass these off as ligitimate answers! After all, WTF do those answers REALLY mena anyway! It's like when people say, "Why did that happen?" and someone answers, "To Glorify God." WHY! Why does it Glorify God?!! (Okay, maybe you need to move in Christian Circles to have heard that a lot! I tried it myself once, I asked a Pastor a question concerning LOT, and he turned the question back at me! WHY DO YOU THINK THAT HAPPENED DAVID? Um .. .To glorify God? THAT'S A COP-OUT ANSWER DAVID - GO THINK ABOUT IT SOME MORE.) Gees, I could write a bit on that too.
Well, let's get to the ACTUAL question - WHAT AM I LOOKING FOR IN A WOMEN?
Okay, let's think carefully about it:
THEY CAN THINK FOR THEMSELVES
I hate YES people! (Or Yes Women in this case!) I need someone who can think for themselves. I don't want to date someone who's opinions are just extensions of my own. What do you think this blog site is for!?
I hate YOBBOS (hope non-Aussies know what that is), so someone who has some self respect is important.
I hate people who disrespect me - so someone who can hold respect for me and expects the same sort of respect in return.
CAN AGREE TO DISAGREE (Be diplomatic/flexible)
I can be pretty opinionated, and so can others - but that doesn't mean we need to kill each other over a difference of opinion - so someone who can honestly agree to disagree on something they don't see eye to eye on.
I've never cheated on anyone in my life - and I expect that same respect in return - so someone with fidelity. If you need to date a multitude of people, then go ahead, just leave me out of the equation. (Only one girl allowed on this ride at any one time)
Someone who LIKES sex - it's not a chore, it's something for people to enjoy - if you don't get pleasure from it, then either you should be celebate or you're doing it all wrong. (Try a Nunnery or get a new BF)
I have a low tolerance for idiots - that doesn't mean you can't make mistakes - gees, I do that all the time, but you have to have a brain and be able to follow logic. I hate wasting my time with someone who doesn't listen or who will ignore facts in favour of what they wish to believe.
KIND TO STRANGERS
You can normally tell the type of person you are dealing with by how they treat strangers. After all, a kind sensitive person realises that strangers are people too, they have their own lives to lead, and they have feelings/goals/friends etc just like you! So some empathy towards the world helps. Jesus summed it up when he said, "You say you love God whom you have never seen, yet you hate your brother whom you have seen!"
Someone who is a good conversationalist. When looks have faded, the bodies cracking up - where else can you turn except to good old fashioned conversation ... and bone breaking sex! D'oh!
GOOD SENSE OF HUMOUR
Okay, a lot of people have different senses of humour, so tastes are different. Still, someone who isn't a constant sour puss and likes to have a few laughs is nice.
Yep! I LOVE white water rafting. I also like trying some things for a first time, and I love travelling. If you're too scared to skydive or something, that's okay (I've already done that), but a love for travelling and maybe trying soem 'dare devil' type stuff would be appreciated. (Or at least not stopping me from doing that sort fo stuff).
Okay, so you're across the room at a party, and you're talking to some guy, and I'm talking to some girl - sure, maybe SHE IS hitting on me, but that guy you're talking to! He's hitting on you! Do you see me getting jealous? NO, because if you're with me, get used to me trusting you 100% (Yeah, that's how my ex got away with cheating on me - but I'm not going to start having jealous fits like some guys do just because one biatch cheated on me! Not all women cheat - and not all men cheat either!) Trust me, as I trust you.
Okay, I had a bit of a bad experience once with a girl a lot younger than me! Yeah, I was single and she was flirting and hitting on me! I was turning her down and she kept telling me that AGE DIFFRENCE didn't matter. Well, eventually she convinced me we should get together. THEN, a few days later, on the DAY we had decided we'd be BF/GF, she suddenly attacked me in a jealous fit! Someone had told her I was secretly with someone else. It was easily disproved, but it did teach me something. This girl wasn't mature enough to do some investigation before she went beserk at me. Sure, it's not the age difference which mattered, it is the maturity - and younger girls haven't got it yet!
Okay, age IS a factor with me! Too old and I don't want you! (That's like one day older than me or more! Yeah, I have a problem!) Too young and I don't want you! Sure, you have your youth, but you look like a FRIGGIN' CHILD to me! YUCK! I don't want to be changing diapers on my partner - and too old or too young ... and that's what happens! Age range should be between 29 and 39. I might go lower than this, but you better not look like a FRIGGIN' baby and you better read the last point on Maturity!
Okay, so you're mature and like early to mid twenties - just remember HOW much older I am to you! You might be changing MY DIAPER in the future! Think about it first! I ain't no spring chicken! Don't get involved if you want someone younger! (Okay, I am still a young forty year old ... so that gives you a time frame).
WILLING TO WORK ON THE RELATIONSHIP
Last long term relationship I was in, I was the one doing the work, compromising, losing, giving up ... and my ex just took, took, took. Okay, so I stayed and kept working - but I learnt. Next time, it HAS to be a team effort - not someone paying lip service to team effort!
After all, if we end up bringing children into this world - then YOU and I have to BOTH be there for the kids! (okay, I have no kids yet! BUT, it's a team effort!)
I'm not violent, and I expect people I am with to be non-violent!
Things which are optional:
- I can make my own! If you REALLY need money, then get a better job!
- looks are nice, but it's only skin deep. (Ugly goes to the bone!) Will you run off and leave me at sixty just because I am getting wrinkly? Well, you won't want that happening either.
- Gees, if you need a better body, I can run behind you with a pointed stick and MAKE you fit and healthy enough. (Please phone ambulance if I keel over doing this though.) :-)
Big House/Fast Car
I guess that's about it! You can ask questions in the COMMENTS section if you feel the need to ask things I haven't covered or you think I should cover in more detail.